As a black, queer, androgynous ( yet mostly masc presenting, lately) person, when I walk into a room it is not uncommon to feel and perceive others viewing me and already assuming they know enough about me without ever even speaking to me. This makes interactions, great or small, difficult and uncomfortable. At first, I used to take responsibility for these assumptions and try my best to reshape their options, putting in a lot of unnecessary effort to gain their favor or at least be seen as their equal. With lots of self reflection of my triggers from past experiences and traumas, intentional commitment to using empowering tools such as affirmations, journaling and mindfulness, I now am at a point where I may observe these shifts in the rooms, and they do not shift me. I am able to take up loving space and show my own authentic light and offer grace and compassion to others recognizing that it may not always be personal, but personal for them, which is not my responsibility.I can be me